Before we get to the RCL madness, let’s talk about madness on cable TV.  Has anyone seen this farce of a show called Hardcore Pawn on ‘Tru’ TV?  I refuse to believe that even 10% of that show is “true”.  Have reality TV shows gone so batshit crazy that networks are now casting people to be in them?  (Ahhhem…. Jersey Shore…… ahem).  In fact, just how far back does this practice go?  Was the bald gay guy who won the original “Survivor” actually an aspiring actor?  Was ‘Puck’ from the original “Real World” really just some gay hating skitzoid?  And dare I even say it, but was Dave Hester conditioned prior to the launch of the show to yell out his bids with “YUUUUUP!!”  ?   I say yes.  But that doesn’t make them bad people.  In fact I vote that the term “reality TV” officially be changed to “low cost talent TV”….. Anyway (as I step down from my soap-box) lets move onto the 3rd to last week of the 2012 Fantasy Hockey Season shall we?
The Toronto Make Beliefs and Jethro were the top teams this week, totaling 19 of a possible 22 points.
Here are the leaders in each category for the week, with the average in brackets:
21 goals(10) Zak Dream Team
23 assists(15) True North Puck Co., Feeding Frenzy
+17  (+3) Razzmatazz
60 PIM(19) Pominville NY
14 PPP(8) True North Puck Co., GoPuckYour……, blunt blazing freak
128 Shots(92) Jolly Razzers
5 wins (3) True North Puck Co., The Price is Right, Chubby Beavers, Rochester Americans
0.98 GAA(2.55) Rocky Mountain Thigh
242 Saves(132) Shiska
.965 Save%(.911) Rocky Mountain Thigh
2 Shutouts(0) The Vincibles, Team Vigilante
RCL 1 W-L-T Pts
1. True North Puck Co. 119-70-20 258
2. Jolly Razzers 118-70-21 257
3. Toronto Make Beliefs 121-76-12 254
4. Puck The Folice 111-81-17 239
5. Razzmatazz 109-88-12 230
6. Feeding Frenzy 105-89-15 225
7. Zak Dream Team 106-91-12 224
8. the barbershop 90-104-15 195
9. Motorboaters 75-117-17 167
10. Pominville NY 73-115-21 167
11. SnepstsMustacheRides 71-127-11 153
12. Rocky Mountain Thigh 62-132-15 139
With just 2 weeks to go in the regular season, 3 teams are battling for the top 2 spots and first round byes in the playoffs. True North Puck Co. blasted Feeding Frenzy 8-2 to squeeze Jolly Razzers out of first place after a 5-week run atop the standings. True North took 4 of 5 goaltending categories from the Frenzy’s dynamic duo of Lundqvist and Quick, with Pekka Rinne and Jaroslav Halak providing outstanding numbers… The Toronto Make Beliefs moved to within 4 points of the lead, trouncing Rocky Mountain Thigh 9-1. The Thigh got 3 great games from Kari Lehtonen, but were hurt by the 4-game minimum appearance rule in this league. Meanwhile, the Red Wing duo of Johan Franzen and Ian White combined for 0 points and -10. The Make Beliefs were led by Steven Stamkos (3 goals, 5 assists, +1, 6 penalty minutes, 4 power play points, and 14 shots) and Marc Andre Fleury (2 wins, 1 shutout, 0.50/.984 ratios)…Teddy Purcell’s 3 goals and 7 assists along with 5 power play points helped Razzmatazz crush Motorboaters 8-2…Pominville NY also won 8-2, over the barbershop, sweeping the offensive categories and winning 2 goaltender categories with 1 win and a 3.72 GAA…Puck The Folice downed SnepstsMustacheRides 7-3 while Zak Dream Team and Jolly Razzers battled to a 5-5 draw. That moved the Dream Team to within 1 point of the final playoff spot.
The CHeap Seats W-L-T Pts
1. Decepticon Dominance 131-64-14 276
2. KyHabs 113-73-23 249
3. Parenteau Guidance 114-79-16 244
4. Jethro 111-81-17 239
5. BlueLineDefenders 98-93-18 214
6. The Price is Right 94-89-26 214
7. Optimus Reim 95-97-17 207
8. Laraque Bottom 92-97-20 204
9. Grabner 5-hole 79-105-25 183
10. BroadStreetBullies 75-111-23 173
11. whobustedass 73-114-22 168
12. Hank for Vezina 57-129-23 137
Jethro, paced by first star of the week, Erik Karlsson, clobbered Grabner 5-hole 9-1. Karlsson score 4 goals and 8 assists, including 4 power play points. He was also +5 and had 13 shots on goal. Jethro’s goalies, Marc Andre Fleury and Henrik Lundqvist combined for a 1.25 GAA and a save percentage of .956. Jarome Iginla scored 1 point and was -6 for Grabner 5-hole…KyHabs held on to 2nd place with a 6-2 win over Hank for Vezina behind Joe Thornton’s 6-point week…The rest of the matchups were all tight contests. The Price is Right slipped by Laraque Bottom 6-4, Optimus Reim downed Decepticon Dominance, also 6-4, whobustedass knocked off BroadStreetBullies 5-3, and Parenteau Guidance edged BlueLineDefenders 6-5. The results leave 4 teams in the fight for the final 2 playoff spots, currently held by BlueLineDefenders and The Price is Right. Optimus Reim and Laraque Bottom are within striking distance though.
RazzPuckBunnies W-L-T Pts
1. Team Vigilante 121-69-19 261
2. Ice Road Puckers 114-85-10 238
3. Greyston Schmohawks 107-86-16 230
4. Jagr Bombs 102-90-17 221
5. Chubby Beavers 95-91-23 213
6. drb_redwings 96-94-19 211
7. Portable Ninja 95-95-19 209
8. Top Shelf 90-99-20 200
9. Gator’s Bitches 81-102-26 188
10. Wampa 82-104-23 187
11. SuicidalEnforcers 82-112-15 179
12. Sin Bin Sadists 78-116-15 171
Team Vigilante wrapped up a playoff spot with 8-3 win over Wampa, with Dustin Brown putting up 6 points and a +4… SuicidalEnforcers climbed out of the basement with a 9-2 whipping of 2nd-place Ice Road Puckers. Andrew Ladd paced the Enforcers with 3 goals, 3 assists, 3 PPP, and 17 shots. Kari Lehtonen contributed 3 wins and a shutout with a GAA of 0.98 and .965 save %. The Puckers missed Pavel Datsyuk (as did Detroit), who will be out for a few weeks with a knee injury… Portable Ninja defeated drb_redwings 7-2 to move to within 2 points of the Wings and the final playoff spot. Martin St. Louis led the Ninja with 4 goals and 2 assists… In other action, Jagr Bombs beat Sin Bin Sadists 7-4, Greyston Schmohawks edged Gator’s Bitches 6-4, and Chubby Beavers tied Top Shelf 5-5.
Bobby Hull Division W-L-T Pts
1. TheMustaches 118-70-21 257
2. GoPuckYour…… 111-74-24 246
3. Rochester Americans 111-81-17 239
4. The Vincibles 104-85-20 228
5. Kneely 103-87-19 225
6. Shishka 102-87-20 224
7. i miss baseball 90-98-21 201
8. Detroit Rust Rats 88-103-18 194
9. blunt blazing freak 87-104-18 192
10. Celtic Frost 82-105-22 186
11. Rasktastic! 74-120-15 163
12. Smarch Snow 70-126-13 153
TheMustaches clinched a playoff spot with a 7-3 win over Rasktastic! Evgeni Malkin continued his MVP season with a line of 5 G/2 A/+3/4 PIM/3 PPP/17 SOG for the winners… GoPuckYour…… also nailed down a playoff spot, beating Detroit Rust Rats 6-4. GPY received some production from their defense, with Dustin Byfuglien scoring twice and notching 4 assists, while Shea Webber added 2 goals… The Rochester Americans swept the goaltending categories in a 6-5 win over Smarch Snow, but will now have to make do without Craig Anderson, who was placed on the IR… The Vincibles also won all goalie stats in their 6-4 win over i miss baseball as Justin Peters played well in Cam Ward’s absence… Celtic Frost defeated blunt blazing freak 6-4 and Kneely squeaked by Shishka 5-4 in other games.